I was going to make this ‘The Most Annoying Literary Siblings of All Time’, but I only had seven of them, and 15 sounds better than seven, so took some out and decided to do the most annoying characters overall instead. :) And obviously I haven't read all the books in the world *and* this is just my own personal opinion, so these obivously aren't really the top fifteen most annoying literary characters of ALL TIME, they're only the top fifteen most annoying literary characters out of the books that I have read so far, but I think my chosen title is much more catchy, don't you?

1). Lydia (Pride and Prejudice)- She has ALWAYS made me the angriest of any character. Ever. Every time I read about how she freaking runs away with freaking Wickham and disgraces her entire freaking family, I want to strangle her. Everyone has to stop their lives to go out and search for Lydia and Wickham and make them get married, and if Mr. Darcy wasn’t into Elizabeth that family would have been screeeeeewed over because of stupid, stupid Lydia. And then she comes back and is like, “Oh, I do SO love married life!! I’ve got bonnets and ribbons and it’s all maaaarvelous, just simply maaaaarvelous!” Lydia makes me so angry I can’t even express how much she actually infuriates me. Is it just me, or does she make anyone else insanely angry, too? I mean, maybe you have to be a history nerd like me to fully appreciate how much of an idiot Lydia is…

2). Amy (Little Women)- Amy was never one of my most despised characters until I started writing. Now, the throwing of Jo’s manuscript into the fire is just unforgivable. If anyone threw my flash drive into a fire, there would be some serious smite-age going on.  

3). Mr. Rochester (Jane Eyre)- “Hello, I’m Mr. Rochester, and I don’t really love Miss Blanche Ingram, as I’ve led you to believe. *chuckles* Oh no, it is YOU I love! BUT, in order to asses your love for me, I have only pretended to desire her. But never fear, my love, you have passed my sick and twisted little test so now I am springing this on you like, ‘supriiiize!! lololzzz!!’ and it was all a great joke and now we shall marry, darling!!! :D But do let us hurry, lest you discover the existence of my demonic, bestial, knife-wielding first wife whom I keep locked up in the attic before we say our vows. ;)”

4). Dolores Umbridge (Harry Potter)- It’s characters like her that make me look favorably upon anarchy. And the whole ‘I must not tell lies’ thing just makes me sick.

5). Bella (Twilight)- “Bella Swan: setting feminism back a whole 100 years.” “Edward can’t read Bella’s thoughts because she has none.” “Bella Swan is a Mary-Sue.” ß That’s all from flair. Oh, I love flair. :) Bella is a whiney, selfish little Mary-Sue brat with no personality who lets her physically and emotionally abusive boyfriend control her life. Go Team Tyler’s Van!!!!!!! :D 

6). About ¾ of the Female Characters In ‘The Crucible’- I want them to go play in traffic. Yes, horse-drawn buggy traffic. It shall be wonderful.  

7). Catherine and Heathcliff (Wuthering Heights)-  Catherine loves Heathcliff, but she marries that other dude, thus causing Heathcliff to go all Mr. Rochester-status to the EXTREME, playing sick little games to take revenge on everyone who ever messed with him in his life, thus screwing over a whole lot of people who never did anything at all to him. Please, shoot me now. Or better yet, just shoot Heathcliff. Then maybe he won’t have a kid and the cousins won’t end up marrying each other in the end. I know that was ok back then but still. Ew.  

8). Manipulative Old Crazy Lady In Great Expectations- Another example of someone screwing over everyone else in order to get revenge, except with a kookier sense of style (missing shoe and a wedding dresses, anyone?) and old, nasty cake.

9). Romeo and Juliet- Yes, killing yourself is quite romantic, especially if it’s for someone you hardly know! :D --Yes people, that was sarcasm. And I want to know how people fall for this crap. ‘Tristan and Isolde’ makes much more sense. ‘Romeo and Juliet’ is sort of the ‘Twilight’ of literary classics to me… 

10). Little Girl In ‘Atonement’- Ok, so I have not yet read this book but I watched the movie and it infuriated me beyond belief and since I know the book is out there, that little girl is going on this dang list, especially since I doubt her annoyingness would lessen with the reading of the book. If anything, I’m betting it would only increase. Ugggh, just look at what she did to her sister, all because she had to jump to conclusions!!! This makes me so sad. :( 

11). Ann (The Gemma Doyle Trilogy)- ANN MAKES ME SO MAD WHEN SHE NEVER STANDS UP FOR HERSELF!!! *Especially* in The Sweet Far Thing!!! I still love Ann, but ugggh, grow some backbone!!!

12). Tati (Wildwood Dancing)- Honey, you can be in love with Sorrow and mope over him without letting your family go to ruins, thanks.

13). Mr. Brocklehurst (Jane Eyre)- There are several literary characters that are complete and total religious hypocrites that I can hardly stand, but Mr. Brocklehurst enrages me the most. Especially when he wants to cut off that poor girls hair. I’d like to see him try to cut off my hair. Hellll no.

14). Dude in The Scarlett Letter (Not The Creeper One, The Preacher One)- Own up, biotch!!

15). Effie (The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants Series)- Steal the sacred pants? Rude. I will cut you.

Honorable Mention:
--Mersault (The Stranger): He’s just a dumbass.
--Zoey, Damian, Stevie Rae, Erica and that last girl (House of the Night series): Their infantile chatter makes me want to bash their heads against a brick wall.
--The Cullens (Twilight): You guys are friggin vampires and you couldn’t figure out that the monster in Bella’s stomach wanted BLOOD?!?!?!?! Fail.
--The Guy From ‘Native Son’: wtf, just stop killing people, damn!!
--Hamlet (Hamlet): wtf, jerkface, wtf…

EDIT [4/29/09]- I have now read "Antigone." Antigone gets honorable mention, too. What a pathetic loser.